Dear SCAD,

You are really good about at making me feel like crap.

There are so many assholes in the world. It's still amazing to me how many of them I met in high school. And how many of them got to me.

The fact that I know very few assholes now makes up for it.

Originally uploaded by emily van ness

We've been having some really wonderfully cute days lately.

Yesterday we went on a photo excursion, and did some errands but it was nice. It's strange to not be around him.



Also, it was FREEZING yesterday. Like my car showed a little snowflake sign next to the temperature. When I took this photo, I couldn't feel my fingers.

i dont have a job anymore and now i dont know what to do.

they can't afford to have someone else working there. this stupid economy.

New Year Goals

About a year and a half ago my mom's friend read my Tarot cards. She knew a lot of things about my future before I could even have an inkling of them. She gave me some advice about making goals. She said that when you set goals for your self you shouldn't say "I want too.." or "I wish..." you should declare "I will..." It's the whole visualization thing. So here's what I will do this year.

I will have my work published.
I will really, actually sell pieces.
I will feel good about myself.
I will feel confident about my photography.
I will be more social, more outgoing.
I will put myself out there.
I will be noticed.
I will have a show of my photos.
I will love him to my fullest.
I will learn and get all that I can out of my education.

Things I want for Christmas

-the Canon 5D Mark II
-a renewed Flickr Pro Account
-to sell things on my Etsy
-vintage cameras and/or a fully functional manual 35mm camera
-my boyfriend back in LA
-a consistent photography style
-to feel like I have a home somewhere
-a 50mm lens


But mostly, that you're enjoying a Happy Holiday Season.

I feel an aching like something in my life really needs to change. I'm not sure what, but something. The more I think about it, I think I just need more in my life. I don't know.